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Goalpost Vol. 5 #1

posted Apr 12, 2014, 11:07 AM by Jim Magrogan

The Goalpost

The 10th Season

Vol. 5 #1

The Mother of All Coed Soccer Newsletters


Thursday April 17th – T’was a Dark and Stormy Night…

After long dark months of bouncing off indoor soccer walls and playing on a flat, pothole free surface it is almost time once again to tighten your cleats to brave the last flings of a Northern Nevada winter (or as Scott “can I bum a fag of thee” Morton and Jim “zero to sixty in 2 days” Wilson call it; a balmy Scottish summer). Yes, as Tiger and his buddies prepare to grace the manicured greens of Augusta it is time for you to perform those elegant balletic feats upon the not-so-manicured pitches we fondly call the local pastures, sorry I mean soccer fields. Pastures, sorry fields, lined with the precision one would only expect from the last departing patron of Coney Island on a chill spring Thursday evening. Yes, it is almost time to kick-off the 10th season of the RSCSL. For all those who played in our inaugural season; how many of you ever imagined you would still be tripping the something somewhat fantastic ten seasons, ten pounds, goodness knows how many grey hairs later….?


By now you have most likely seen the team rosters and have heard from your captains (if not, you will soon). Since initial publication of the rosters a few “personnel” issues have come up that may require some tweaking. I always reserve the right to tweak although I am not that kind of tweaker.


Pay the Money and Run…

Yes, we raised the fees a wee bit. Why? Well, we had to. As outraged as you might be it was needed to preserve our solvency, and  inflate a few soccer balls. To insure we do not become just another corpse in the graveyard of other US soccer leagues next off-season please pay your fees ASAP if you have not already done so! You can go to the website to pay by credit card, or you can mail a check to RSCSL 5694 Tappan Drive, Reno. NV, 89523 or catch me somewhere like the Sportsdome and slip me a Benjamin. For those who do not know me, I am the cherubic Beckhamesque geezer with the funny accent who plays in goal for anyone who will have me. Your expeditious attention to this matter is truly appreciated – it is no fun chasing people for money. In fact, it is even less fun than picking the ball out of the ol’ onion bag, which sadly I have done far too many times in my not always stellar career between the sticks.


Like the Grass Stains in Our Socks

In the high stakes, turbo-charged world of Truckee Meadows coed football (soccer) selecting the teams is not an easy task. In an genuine attempt to create parity I have embraced a complex, somewhat mystical calculus to both integrate and differentiate familial preferences, BFFs, sudden romantic liaisons of all ilk, sudden unromantic liasons, threat-laden emails and what not that create much controversy amid the smoke-filled speakeasies that span the McCarran loop. On paper I think we have tempered individual delusion and modesty to create 10 pretty darn even teams. Having said that, games are played on grass (mostly) not paper. On any given game day vacation, business trips, drama, inebriation, injury, pregnancy and other intangibles can throw the proverbial spanner (wrench) into the works, but I have to conclude that over an 18 game season like the grass stains in our socks it all comes out in the wash with every team finishing with the same number of points. Of course, like David Moyes, we could just get it all completely wrong. However, if we all had a good time and made a few new friends and burned a few calories what does it matter in what is really the low-stake world of Truckee Meadows coed football (soccer)?


Space Time Coordinates

As I type I am still finalizing field arrangements thus I remain reluctant to publish the exact schedule until all the T’s have been crossed, the eyes crossed, I mean I’s dotted, the fields lined and the corner posts all firmly in place, What you can likely expect are a few less games at Reno (blame it on Lacrosse, not Rio) and two games on occasion at Bishop Manogue most likely on a natural rather than an artificial surface. North Valleys will be in use for the first half of the season before switching to South Valleys in mid-June. Stay tuned and make sure you check where your game is each week. With expansion comes complication, we may even have a game or two in Kiev or Sevastopol.


Sugar, Sugar

This year for the first half of the season our official recovery room, at least for the North Valleys games, will be Archies (hence the sugar, sugar reference – know what I am talking about and you are dating yourself and not in a Billy Idol way). Archies is very close to the UNR campus on Virginia, and as well-situated as we could possibly find the first half of the season. For those playing in the south, Lamppost Pizza is the official spot and will remain so when we all migrate south South come summer.


Not only is this season a milestone, it also happens to be a World Cup year. Hopefully we can congregate to celebrate and perhaps suffer as we watch our heroes succumb to the humidity and coed-eating beasts of Amazonia. Many of you offered to volunteer when you registered. If you are interested in planning an event or two around World Cup games, let me know and I will take you up on that offer.


Continuing on the volunteer topic I will almost certainly be looking for some help the weekend of April 12/13 to get fields and goals ready. Contact me at if you can spare a few hours.


Toodles for now, and remember don’t follow me, follow the Spurs.