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Goalpost Vol. 5 #3

posted Apr 29, 2014, 7:55 AM by Jim Magrogan

The Goalpost

Brought to You by

Chris Smith, Realtor

let Chris move you in or move you on

The 10th Season

Vol. 5 #3

The Mother of All Coed Soccer Newsletters

Reggie: the Sequel

All the News Worth Making Up


Thursday May 1st – 6pm KO

Forecast – baking hot and dry by British standards

Chaingang v Wright Stuff                                              North Valleys 1

Paperless Tigers v OBG Stoners                                 Reno High

Euro Envy v Quattro                                                        North Valleys 2

Golden Slumbers v Real Studs                                    Bishop Manogue

Surgical Strikers  v Bhoys & Ghirls                              North Valleys 3



On the touchlines last week I caught a few icy glares aimed my way as the sun went down and the chill of spring air whistled around the nether regions. My response, you should be glad we did not play on Wednesday or Friday, if looks could kill (and they probably will) I would have been a dead man on either of those nights. The bottom line is this: I never cease to be amazed at my ability to protect you from the elements. What do I have in store this week? Eighty degrees at kick off, that is what. It is time to mothball those leggings.  


Fresh  from the Teleprinter - April 24th Results

Chaingang 1 v 2 Bhoys & Ghirls                   

Paperless Tigers 2 v 2 Quattro                       

Euro Envy 1 v 3 Surgical Strikers     

OBG Stoners 2 v 1 Golden Slumbers             

Real Studs 5 v 4 Wright Stuff


Hanging Chads and the Senior Vote: Florida All Over Again

After a couple of lopsided score lines last week we returned to parity with two goals representing the largest margin of victory in yet another action-packed week where hamstrings and quads went twang more often than a double-bass at a Rockabilly revival. Down south OBG’s AARP contingent served notice that age can still trump beauty with a 2-1 victory over the Slumbers. The combined age of OBG’s goal scorers (the Stoners-in-chief – Duffy, P & Breen) totaling somewhere north of 120 suggests that the Golden Slumbers must have been taking a nap on their behalf. Adjacent, the Scottish Diaspora was getting up to its usual tricks denying Reggie “always gets mentioned” Bolden the next thing on his bucket list; a second shut-out or, as we say in good ol’ Blighty, a clean sheet. An inconsolable Bolden claimed that the contents of the Bhoys & Ghirls’ kilts were just too much of a distraction as his Chaingang were unable to unlock last week’s score-at-will-spirit and left Chad, shall we say, hanging at the back.


On Any Given Thursday

Northbound the Real Studs were provided a firmer foundation with the out-of-goal debut of Ernesto “old enough” Oliden as they ventured into the unfamiliar territory known as victory. It was a near run thing but just like Nelson at Trafalgar, Wellington at Waterloo or Tottenham at Stoke the Studs emerged triumphant over the Wright Stuff. In a state of near delirium the Stud’s captains Dean & Kate “Kaspheerian” can finally dare to dream once again.


Moving on over the return of Dr. Nick Sparkle delivered a sledgehammer blow to the already-injury-ridden Euro Envy. With the precision of a trauma surgeon he sliced and diced his way through the Envy’s defense to a hat-trick that left them in stitches and serving notice to all those other young pretenders amongst us that he might be next to knot the laces of the revered golden boot.


To the left or right depending on how you look at it and buoyed by substitute Jeff “there is a to” Morrow, the tuned-up Team Quattro finally got out of first to surprise the Paperless Tigers (and themselves) twice coming back to cage the Tigers in a 2-2 tie. League debutants, the evergreen Jim and Jamie Verdi, both scored for the Tigers but the never-say-die Quattro pegged them back with goals from Angie “generally-not-so-fast” Phillips and Rich “almost-always-offside” Hollis.








I (Andrew) have a friend who has a house keeping; house-sitting; pet-keeping business. She is looking to drum up business. I know she will do a great job for you. So, if you are in the market or know someone in the market call Amy at 775-560-1462; mention my name. Or if you prefer, contact me at .


I (Andrew) also have a son who is looking for work this summer while home from college. Ideally he is looking for the opportunity to “intern” in an engineering environment, but he will venture beyond. He is a very smart, diligent young man with an impeccable academic record. If you are looking for some temporary help or know someone who is, let me send you his resume. Contact me at .




If you have not paid your registration fee, you MUST do so soon. The league depends on you. You know who I am and where to find me. Or give it to your skippers.


The Goalpost 

Got something to sell? Looking for employees? Got something you want to say? Whatever it is feel free to use this fine publication to reach an educated and affluent audience! Maybe you want to join the editorial and writing staff of this award-winning newsletter – just send it!

Indoor Soccer

Despite the fact that outdoor soccer is now getting into full swing, indoor soccer does continue, even for us older folks. Men’s over 40 plays Monday and Tuesday evenings and senior coed now shifts to Tuesday nights. If you would like to get involved go to to find out what is going on. Owen at the dome might well be able to find you a team.


Our Sponsors

All our sponsors have a league connection and they might just be able to help you with:


Bike needs – Brian Crowder, Peloton Bicycles

Tax needs – Cory Wright

Insurance needs – Paul Roberti, Liberty Mutual

Landscaping needs – Richmond Breen

Relaxation needs – Klaus Grimm, Massage Envy

Data management needs – Justin Long, PDI

All your anesthesia needs – Brian Buehler

Appendix removal and more – Martin Bain, Nick Spoerke, Western Surgical

New car needs – Audi of Reno

Construction needs – Ira Cross, Tahoe Lumber